this is me again, with the third post in two days. I realize this is a lot, however it won’t be that many of them anymore. Yes, you read it right. And before a crowd with torches and pitchforks prevents me from trying to explain myself… It is true – I’m going on a break and here is why.
The truth is, I’ve had free days ever since the end of June and one would think that I will make good use of this opportunity and even prepare posts beforehand, but, as you know, life rarely works out as you planned it. First, I was in a rush to prepare posts for when I left to Russia and I also happened to have started making poses, which threw another wrench into the works, because I had yet another task that required my attention, apart from the bonuses. When July rolled around, I started attending French courses from Monday to Friday, 5:30 pm to 7:45 pm. Evenings have always been my favorite time of the day, so this alone was inconvenient, not to mention the fact that I then had to do homework and the French started taking up more of my time. Apart from that, I am a person who tends to get sick easily and is not generally of good health. I often suffer from migraines, general tiredness (I never get enough sleep, even if I wake up at late hours), stomach aches, as well as the issues of more psychological nature, such as mental breakdowns, overwhelming sadness, etc. Now, I’m not saying this for you to feel sorry for me, there are other reasons for me never having time to prepare posts early enough such as my general tendency to procrastinate, but when all of these add up, I practically always end up preparing posts during nights from Friday to Saturday, when I’m also in panic, trying to make everything work to have a post up on Saturday, as it should be. As for you, I don’t think you necessarily experienced any changes – the posts were there on Sundays, as usual. But for me – it was different. Because of the tight schedule, I started doubting my abilities as a writer – the texts were often rushed and not thought out or satisfying. I felt as if I could do much more than that, but I simply never had the time to make these posts good in my own eyes. This made Hailey’s generation pass by way too quickly for me to get a handle of and I felt like it brushed by me without me quite realizing it. As opposed to how it usually is, I didn’t start to form any concrete plans for the next generation, too focused on getting the rest of stuff for this generation posted on time. When I started to think of what I would do for the next Saturday, when I should post the prologue to Ron’s generation, I realized I don’t have anything good planned. All I have is very brief, general idea of Clint and Ron traveling together, but I can’t see myself again perfecting chapters on short notice, because all it would do is get me stressed and displeased again – I know it, because I’ve been through that exact same thing for close to a half of Hailey’s generation. For these chapters, I did have some plans, but the clear plans ended when Hailey married Reggie. Then I had to rewrite my notes, because they were too brief and didn’t provide a clear perspective for me to work with. When I rewrote my notes, they were hardly satisfying and this started this whole spiral of stress and anxiety, along with Chapter 5.16 Getting my Priorities Right, which was the first chapter scheduled for when I flew to Russia, which I’m pretty sure was the first chapter I genuinely did not like. One would think that I would come back refreshed after my trip to Russia, but then I fall into a trap of trying to perfect my poses and you know it – I stayed up the night to finish the next chapter. Then it practically started being a habit. The bonuses, I think, are the only ones I am satisfied with, as I’d planned them way beforehand and was really looking forward to sharing. So no – Ron’s generation isn’t planned and in all honestly, this is causing me anxiety, because I need to have even a brief, overall idea of his generation before I start working on it. As a plus, the kids are still teens in my game, there are many projects that I put aside because I had to work on my story, I have 40 out of 74 couple poses I wanted to finish before the end of August, the Sims I’ve been wanting to publish for a long time have been left in my library for eternity, as well as Hailey and Reggie’s house, my game isn’t cooperating and is throwing tantrums (crushes) at me, I need to work on moving my family to another town when the next generation rolls around, I need to update my header and prepare the layout for my blog, I need to figure out Ron’s voice, I need to update family relations on my family tree, I’ve been wanting to clear out my old posts for a long time… But guess what? The story has been getting in the way of each of these projects. Now that holidays are coming to an end and I’ll be coming back to school, I not only haven’t relaxed, I feel like I’ve been constantly overwhelmed with work. This is my last free week, then I will be bombarded with school work, meaning what I have now will be nothing. As you can imagine, this is not going to make working on the story any easier. Because generation 5 has just come to an end, and generation 5 is also exactly in the middle of the classic, 10-generational legacy challenge, I think it’ll be a reasonable step to take a break now and not dive into the next generation, risking I may not make it work – now, let’s be real, I will make it work, because I will feel forced to, but the quality will most likely deteriorate a great deal. This is not what I want my story to be for me – it should not be considered a tough chore. This is supposed to be entertaining and relaxing for me, but for the past few weeks it has not been anything to be described with positive adjectives.
Okay, now that I feel like I’ve complained enough, I want to talk about things that are more positive. I promised Darren I will edit out his finished story chapters for him on his blog called The Musketeers, which some of you may remember me recommending some time ago. Darren wants it to end on 23rd September with a special last chapter, 27th chapter of the story. He doesn’t have that many chapters on there still, I think, and I definitely recommend his story, especially if you’re into time travel or sci-fi themes. He’s very creative with a great imagination. So, while I will not be updating this story, I will gladly recommend you to catch up on his.
Finally, I do not know how much time my hiatus will last, I just hope my obsessiveness doesn’t force me to post a chapter on Saturday anyway (you just never know), but I want you to know that it doesn’t mean I’ll be away from WordPress. I even consider catching up on stories I’ve been wanting to read it, but – you guessed it – didn’t have time for because I worked on my own story. So yes, I will still be there and I’ll still be reading and commenting many amazing stories I’m following. I will see how about my own Sims projects, I hope to get working on them at some point and publish them without giving an exact date this time.
I hope you understand my reasons and that they are valid. I’ve just checked my blog posts and after analyzing them, I realized I’ve been updating on Saturdays ever since chapter 1.22 (October 15th, 2016) and at 3 pm ever since chapter 2.12 (January 21st, 2017), getting it wrong once with chapter 5.3 (April 7th, 2018), which was published at 2 pm, because I forgot about a time change and didn’t change the hour on time, and of course with the 3rd Frank bonus, which was published at 5:06 pm. All the awards and random posts I didn’t consider here. But you see, this schedule has been fitting for me for a long time, but it’s recently become a real pain for me to keep it up. And so, I hope that you understand and also that you realize I’m doing it also to keep the story as high in quality as possible, also for my Readers. This is also a good time if you’ve been meaning to catch up and felt overwhelmed by my posting.