Bonus Post: From the life of Frank Cavender #1

My name is Frank Cavender, I’m a law student, 22 and I’m ga…

Okay, that has to be the worst introduction ever. Let’s try again.

1.jpg

Hi! It’s me, Frank. I’m 22, on my 4th year of law and I’m also married to the best man in the world – that is Way, short for Waylon, my life partner I look up to, each day just wishing I had this amazing self-confidence of his. But then, there is also Clint, short for Clinton, our son, who’s already 3 years old. How time flies! But really, Clint is not my biological son, neither he is Waylon’s, he is in fact my step brother. Yet that is probably too complicated for this first time I’m trying to write something coherent about my life, so maybe I will not delve into details. As far as I’m concerned, he is part of our loving family and you see, that’s what it really counts! What really worries me about this is how many people cannot see what really counts. Just thinking about my father makes me sick to my stomach.

2.jpg

I will never be able to voice how much suffering he’s caused me. Someone who’s straight, I think, will never understand how diminishing the act of coming out can be, especially if the right to come out yourself is taken away from you, which is how it was in my case. To this day I just have no idea how he’d found out beforehand…

3.jpg

I don’t think I want to know, because another thing that makes me sick to my stomach is how people just try to tell me they know I’m gay, because it just shows. I don’t think I can tell they’re straight, because it shows?

But Way… Well, Waylon wants to take me to the Pride Parade. The manifestation in which you fight for being treated equally with the “straights”. Some people will say that we do not have anything to fight for anymore and clearly, they just have no idea how many people there are who still cause so much suffering to us. So what if we have the right to marry? That doesn’t mean that people will automatically treat us as… people. Yes, just that simple. I don’t want to be told I’m a sodomite anymore, that I’m living in a sin for loving someone and wanting to be with them. With him, actually! I’ve heard enough living with a man who claimed he’s Catholic. The very same man who had a lover in my best friend, while being married to my mother. Needless to say, they’re not together anymore.

But the thought of attending a parade scares me. Sure, I back this idea, but I am just scared. The world scares me, so I try to build these walls around me to protect myself from more suffering. Waylon doesn’t understand that. He’s performing some kind of emotional blackmail on me, saying I don’t want to go to that parade with him, because I am ashamed of him and in turn clearly do not love him as much as I claim. I’m hurting when he says those things. He knows what effect he has on me. Making my skin crawl when he’s around. He still sometimes manages to make my cheeks red. And here I thought I’ve grown out of this. But what I love the most is how he says my name. The softness in his voice when he shortens it to Frankie is what gets me every time. I can’t voice how lucky I am to have him as my husband. I just wish he didn’t insist as much. Guess that’s what you get for marrying an advocate who happens to be a son of an advocate as well. Don’t get me wrong, I love him and think he’s awesome. Doubt I’d ever do as well as a lawyer, though. Way just seems cut out for the job.

Lately I’ve been exploring LGBTQ content on YouTube. It warms my heart to see so many people similar to me just being themselves. It makes me feel better, and each day I feel more like a real part of this community. It’s hard to admit that your parents may not be right in every field and what they say is not always right. Admitting this, however, is a part of growing up. For me this growing up is definitely taking longer than it is for other people. It’s okay, though. Someday, I hope, I will be more self-confident. Probably never as much as Way, but I’m getting there. I just need time, something my husband is not willing to give me. Living with someone really opens your eyes to some things, such as the fact that they have flaws as well. No, my partner is definitely not a perfect person, and he evidently lacks in patience. When asked, though, he’d tell you it’s all me for I am limited and refuse to be truly me. I won’t deny that there is some truth in that…

4.jpg

Waylon came home today when I was watching a lyric video for Troye Sivan’s Bloom along with our “Clint Boy”, as he likes to call him. I have to say I love the visuals and the artist as well. He reminds me a bit of Waylon with his self-confidence. I don’t think I am able to tell the amount of times I rewatched the entire “Blue Neighbourhood” trilogy. Not that I’d show it to Clint. Definitely too sexual for a child this young! He wouldn’t understand anyway.

When hubby came home, he instantly rushed to kiss me and Clint in a form of greeting. Then he leaned in to see what I was watching.

5.jpg

“Troye again, huh?” He asked, rolling his eyes. “One may think you like this guy more than your own husband. You’ve been watching this video all the time ever since it came out. Are you sure you don’t have some studying to do, Frankie?” Sometimes it is as if he treated my studies more seriously than me, and I’m that kind of a panicky guy who feels like he doesn’t know a thing before the test and then aces it anyway. And really, Way? Like I could even be attracted to a digitially made guy in the video? Let’s be serious.

“No, I’m done with exams for now, I told you. Plus, I thought Clint would enjoy the video. It’s almost like a cartoon.”

“Cartunes, cartunes!” Clint chimed in, clapping. Yeah, it’s worrying how much this boy loves television. Maybe we should invest in something more educational for him?

7.jpg

“You do realize what this song is really about, though, don’t you, Frankie?” Way asked, visibly amused. Oh yeah, I forgot to tell you that my hubby sometimes tends to treat me as a complete philistine. I know that he comes from an intellectual family, but that doesn’t give him the right to feel as if he was better than others, but that tendency sometimes rears its ugly head, especially if he wants to remind me he finished his studies and I still have a bit to go!

“Yeah, I do. Flowers and gardens. Very fit for the summer.” Way just rolled his eyes again in response. How can he even look so hot while he’s treating me like an idiot? Some things will always stay a mystery to me.

8.jpg

“Oh, Frankie, you’re so clueless and innocent it’s almost hurting me. But I guess we have a lifetime ahead of us to work on that, don’t we? First we’ll start with a little para…” I sighed, interrupting him. And here we go again. I glanced at Clinton, happily bouncing on the sofa. It breaks my heart when we have to argue around him.

9.jpg

“I’m not going to any parade, Way. I told you we wouldn’t have anyone to leave Clint with.” I said, knowing it’s not a primary reason for my unwillingness and aware of the fact that, unfortunately, Waylon has the ability to see right through me.

“You’re making a big deal out of it. It’s only a few days in Bridgeport, which you may benefit a lot from.” He argued. I looked at him almost apologetically.

10.jpg

“I’m not convinced.”

11.jpg

“Then be! I can’t believe it. I mean, you’re married to me, a man, you’re benefiting from what so many people before us have fought so hard for, and you can’t even drag your bu…” At that moment he looks at Clint.”…body to the freaking parade, which fights for equality! June is Pride Month, in celebration of the Stonewall Inn events. June is quickly coming to an end, though, and we haven’t been to any sort of celebration. You know how important it is to show we are here, always have been and will always be?” Then he stormed out of the room.

“Wait! Way!” I ran after my husband, desperately trying to stop him, but he shut the door to our bedroom, not letting me in.

12.jpg

At that moment I felt my heart sink and my cell phone ringing…

Note: Hi, guys, it’s me! You probably weren’t expecting me back that quickly, but I currently have a lot of time on my hands and so I finished installing and copying everything and here we go with the first post prepared on my new computer, which I’ve already grown to love. The magic of CAS categories loading in seconds… Anyway, referencing the events of this bonus, I wanted to delve more into Frank’s character and to, again, tie the loose ends – so that you would know that no, Hailey outing Frank back in their teenage years wasn’t something that came and went away, he actually had to suffer a lot because of her actions. But he seems happy now… and what is it again?

  • “Are you sinking the Fraylon ship, are you out of your mind, Jowita?”
  • “What do you think you are doing?!”
  • “Make Fraylon great again, and do it now!”

Uh, yeah, I am not, and saying that before a wild crowd with rakes and torches comes after me to burn me at the stake. So basically Waylon and Frank come from very different social backgrounds and they have difficulty understanding one another. Way was raised in a very liberal household and his family was very supportive whilst Frank’s… You get the picture. Oh, and of course Bloom is an actual song, to quote Genius, “described as a gay anthem with sexual undertones about β€œthe receptive partner losing his virginity”.” So maybe you get now why Waylon was finding the whole situation so amusing. But Frank really had no idea. Don’t worry too much about the call, though – all will be explained when the right time comes (aka Saturday with another Hailey chapter).Β  Also sorry for practically ignoring Clinton the whole time, but I was focused on something entirely different. Doesn’t he look just like Cedric, though?

Thank you for reading and I hope you enjoyed it. According to my plans, I should have another little post on Wednesday. Just something specifically made for the mentioned here Pride Month ❀

Advertisements

43 thoughts on “Bonus Post: From the life of Frank Cavender #1

  1. I love bonus posts! And this was no exception. πŸ˜€ I liked seeing how Frank and Way get along in more detail. And Clint is cute. I can really see both sides of their issue and I hope they can work through this with both of them feeling satisfied with the outcome.

    This is a really good post, as usual, Jowita. πŸ™‚

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I love bonus posts, too. Character development all the way! I don’t know if you noticed, but it’s #1, so there should be at least one more πŸ˜‰
      Disagreements are a part of each relationship. The important thing about them is finding a solution and working it out together. They should try to understand each other more.
      Thank you very much, Kym β™₯

      Liked by 1 person

  2. After reading your note at the end, I totally understand why they would be arguing over pride. I do think Frank should at least attempt to go and be surrounded by like-minded people, but Waylon shouldn’t be overly pushy. Nice to see more about their lives!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Yeah, I figured it wasn’t that obvious why they would pick a reason like that to argue over, so I wanted to explain it better. Glad you understand it now! I also think that Frank should attempt to go, even if just for the sake of Waylon who just treats it as a way of bonding with his husband. For him it really means a lot to go with his partner, when he’d been going alone for a few years. Plus he believes it may help Frank with his obvious self-confidence troubles. I’m glad you enjoyed these behind the scenes content.

      Liked by 1 person

  3. I really enjoyed this special look into Fraylon. Frank has a lot of things that he still has to work on, and Waylon needs to be more patient. They both come from very different families, but those differences should help support each other, not be a way to drive them apart.
    Every married couple has arguments (it’s just part of being in a relationship), so I am not too worried about the Fraylon ship sinking yet. But I really hope Frank decides to go to the pride parade. I think it will really do him some good.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I am so glad you enjoyed it. I thought this post was rather random. I just wanted to write more about Frank whom you know I adore.
      There is always field for improvement and development. Definitely true. I think Frank is secretly jealous that not only Waylon’s parents are so supportive, they are also not divorced. They should support one another and try to understand the other person more.
      Of course it is a part of being in a relationship. I just wanted to make it clear because some of my readers smell too many disasters everywhere and I was not anywhere near trying to break them up. I also think that it will do Frank some good. Seeing things on the internet is one thing, but in real life it’s so much better.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. I think that once Frank is at the pride parade he will feel better being surrounded by like minded people. He grew up so isolated, and almost hated by his father. Being around people that accept him for who he is, no matter who that is, will make him more confidant in his own skin.
        And I certainly agree with Waylon’s arguments, just not how it came across. The LGBTQ community has been fighting for a very long time for equality. There is still a long fight to go, but the fact that Waylon can go to a pride parade with his HUSBAND is certainly something to celebrate.

        Liked by 1 person

      2. I also think so. I think it will make him feel less alone in this. He’s not the only one after all. Definitely, he had to pretend to be in a relationship with Hailey so that his classmates wouldn’t eat him up.
        I also think it is a reason to celebrate and I’m super happy that my boys had the right to marry. I think it’s lovely, and a huge step forward. It may be just my TS3 game, but the problem is real.

        Liked by 1 person

      3. Yes, for sure.
        Everyday in the news you hear about people being discriminated against simply by being just who they are. It is sad really. We need things like Pride Month to remind us that deep down we really aren’t that different after all.

        Liked by 1 person

  4. I really liked this ❀ Poor Frank, I hope he'll go to the parade and have a great time. I think Waylon is in the right that he should go and as someone's already said it would be good for him. It's hard to embrace his sexuality when he's been mistreated like that after being outed (also: ugh, what the f, Hailey, you numpty), but going to events like the parade would be a step in the right direction πŸ™‚
    I'm excited to see your pride post ❀

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I’m glad everyone seemed to enjoy this post which mostly came out of my selfish need to write more about Frank.
      I also agree with Waylon, although he may come off a bit too pushy, and isn’t very sensitive to his husband.
      It’s hard for Frank because he has some kind of trauma from the time he was a teen and his family didn’t support him. Lol, that scene when she kissed Cedric was so messed up, not in just the fact that she outed Frank. It should help πŸ™‚
      Oh yes, I want to share my thoughts on all the queer characters in my story so far.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Hey, you shared it with us and we all like Frank, so it’s hardly selfish πŸ˜€ Who doesn’t like getting to know nice characters some more? ❀
        It's true he's not very sensitive, though as you said in your author's note, they grew up very differently. It can be really hard for people who grew up in nice homes to understand those who didn't.
        Can't wait to hear more ❀

        Liked by 1 person

      2. For me it still is. I would make Frank heir if I could. He’s just loveable.
        Well, yes, Waylon can be a spoiled rich brat at times, though he isn’t always like that, thankfully.
        I shared this little post on our FB group, although I hesitated a bit since it’s not even a chapter.

        Liked by 1 person

  5. Oooh, a Fraylon post!! And yeah, I knew I would love this before I even read it πŸ˜‰
    Hmmm I can see there are some issues there (like other people said, Frank needs to work a little on his self confidence while Waylon should be more patient with his husband); but I don’t see something that can’t be fixed – unless those feelings of frustration towards each other will remain inside and grow into resentment. But I hope that this will not be the case. You’re both lawyers darn it, talk! 😁
    I really liked this bonus! (And it goes without saying that I really look forward to your next chapter! – hmm, technically I just said it. Oops 😁)

    Liked by 1 person

    1. So did you love it or only really liked it? Lol πŸ˜‡ Yeah, I thought it was awkward, this post and I’m not really pleased with it. I totally spent the night taking pictures, first thing I did on my new computer.
      There are definitely issues, but, as you said, they aren’t anything that can’t be overcome. Ha, ha, I’ve recently realized that there is apparently a stereotype of law students being gay. I swear I hadn’t even known before and definitely didn’t do it on purpose πŸ˜‚
      Next post should be up on Wednesday and it will be my reflections on all the LGBTQ characters in my story so far, just in celebration of pride month.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Haha, I loved it! ❀
        Oh no, I only meant that typical lawyers should be talkative and armed with arguments, I didn't mean that their profession of choice says something about their sexuality (I've never heard of that sterotype to be honest – and certainly series like "Suits" don't promote it, lol). I hope my comment didn't come off like that!
        I love this idea, can't wait for your next bonus post then! πŸ˜‰ πŸ˜€

        Liked by 1 person

      2. Yay!
        Oh no, I didn’t mean to imply that you meant that, I just thought it was hilarious what I did without knowing that a stereotype like this exists. I only heard some dude say he must be gay because he wants to study law and him explaining to his friends that’s a typical law student. I’d never heard of it before.
        I can’t wait to get into preparing it. I totally wasted my whole day today trying to make poses and being a noob and now my spine hurts like crazy from excessive staring at the computer and not leaning on a chair. I’ve just read you have a cold, though. Get better soon!

        Liked by 1 person

      3. What?! That’s crazy, I was watching a tutorial about pose making today, haha! That’s nuts! I wish you good luck on the pose making (at this point I’ll probably stick to tutorial watching and maaaybe after summer I’ll give it a shot)!
        Thank you so much! ❀ (the good news is that I'll be able to lazy a bit and write the next chapter for which I already have the pictures πŸ˜‰) I hope you'll feel better soon too! πŸ˜€ ❀

        Liked by 1 person

      4. Ha, ha. I’m done watching, I just rewatched some stuff today and I totally get everything, but getting the movements right is a bit tricky. And I somehow end up pressing some keyboard shortcut and ruining my work. Not to mention the suffering with my spine πŸ˜‚
        I will see how it goes. I haven’t given up yet.
        Thank you. A new chapter – yes, please!

        Liked by 1 person

  6. Aww this bonus was sweet and kinda sad. Frank is such a sweetheart, and he deserves every bit of happiness for accepting everything Hailey did so cooly. (The little thought bubble Hailey had saying ‘the heck, it’s totally my fault’ made me laugh πŸ˜‚) It’s sad that Waylon is connecting Frank not wanting to go to the parade with him being ashamed of him, because that very clearly isn’t the case. And the fact that he treats Frank like he’s less educated than he actually is is an annoying habit… I guess differences are expected considering how different their upbringings were. I still adore Fraylon though and hope they can see eye to eye. The fact that Waylon censored butt is amusing to me because there are worse things he could’ve said XD. Clinton is becoming a spitting image of Cedric with that bright blond hair there~ That’ll be a constant reminder of whose son he really is, lol. A world with fast loading CAS, what a dream :’) Looking forward to your other bonus!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I also think it was rather bittersweet. Frank is just lovely and I adore him. Yup, we still remember how she outed Frank to get closer to his father, that girl was even more of a mess as a teen πŸ˜‚
      Waylon is sad because he knows Frank would be more cool with him if he was a female, which is a couple that all people accept. But what he told Frank is not what he really believes in, he just treated it as a way to soften his husband’s heart and convince him. It is an annoying habit, but as I’ve already mentioned to someone, Waylon is practically this rich brat who tends to look down on everyone. Doesn’t happen all the time, but it’s rather annoying. So totally different than Frank who is rather humble and modest. But maybe that is why they became so attracted to one another in the first place – they are very different.
      I also adore Fraylon, I think they’re a good couple and their issues are not ones severe enough to be too hard to overcome. I am sure Waylon will continue to support Frank and help him build his self confidence.
      Lol, there are totally worse things he could’ve said. I guess he’s just taking on the role of a father too seriously. xD
      Clinton does look a lot like Cedric. I wish Fraylon could have a child who would be just theirs, or at least for one of them to be a father, but I guess life worked out differently for them.
      That is indeed a dream :’) I love my new computer. Ooh, excited for it, too!

      Liked by 1 person

  7. What a great bonus post!
    It made me sad to see Fraylon arguing, but it only makes sense considering their vastly different ways of growing up. I trust that they will pull through together — no marriage has zero problems, and I think if they sit down and really talk to each other, they can find a happy medium.
    The part about Frank reflecting on Youtube/Bloom was quite lovely. I do see why he doesn’t want to go to the parade, but I feel like it would help him be more open and confident in general.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you!
      It makes me sad, too, but as I’ve recently heard some lesbian artist say, the pride in LGBTQ is so strong that they have to show off only the good sides of their relationship, and there’s no relationship without any trouble, same-sex or not. I wanted to share this tidbit of information so that you would, as readers, understand better where it’s coming from. I also think that they can work it out.
      Frank is cute and, admittedly, he’s as clueless as Clint about some things, which, again, is the opposite of Waylon who spent several years living with the LGBTQ community. Their different ways of growing up are showing yet again. And even if Frank wasn’t gay, I think, he’d still be this innocent, it’s just part of his personality. I also think a parade would do him good.

      Liked by 1 person

  8. Poor Clinton gets no love! Lol….maybe when he gets older he will make his presence known…

    Fast loading CAS is awesome…..I found that as well. Do you use MCC to collapse all the different color previews. That makes it load even faster…

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Lol, I know. Clinton will get his story as he gets older, you’re right.
      Oh, that is not TS4, so I have Master Controller, not MCC, so don’t know if it’d work. I can’t be bothered to edit my CAS settings anyway.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Yes…I meant MasterController. It will just show one preview of the outfit, instead of loading three presets. It makes it load super fast. But if it’s already fine, then no worries…

        Liked by 1 person

  9. I hope everything is going well with your new computer! Sounds like it is πŸ™‚

    Hmm, I totally get Waylon’s point, but being a more shy/antisocial type of person I do relate to Frank. Not everybody wants to be an activist, they are just trying to live their life.

    Liked by 1 person

  10. Oh, Waylon… not everyone is as lucky as you. I’m sorry Frank had to go through all this BS with his own father. It that light, it’s completely understandable that he would be scared to attend a pride march.

    Liked by 1 person

  11. I think Waylon shouldn’t put pressure on Frank. If Frank doesn’t feel comfortable with this kind of things, he oughtn’t go there. I know this is very important to Waylon, but he must understand Frank. Not everybody is ready to go to the parade. Unfortunatley, Waylon has to go to the Bridgeport alone. Sorry, I’m standing by Frank side and (in this case) it’s justified.
    Clinton looks like Cedric, he is his clone. When Clint gets older, he will ask questions to his parents. I’m curious what Frank and Waylon will tell him. And I wonder who is calling to Frank. It’s definitely not Waylon.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Waylon’s being too pushy, but he isn’t as empathetic as Frank and can’t imagine being in his husband’s shoes. Frank’s insecure and he doesn’t feel comfortable with the thought of going to such a big gathering with his husband.
      Clinton looks a lot like Cedric and he definitely will want to know who his biological parents are soon.
      Noo, Waylon isn’t calling him from the bedroom, that’d be stupid πŸ˜›

      Liked by 1 person

    1. I actually love Frank much more than Hailey whom I am not really a fan of. So it was just a pleasure. I hope to have another bonus up soon. I am trying, because if I could, I would probably set up a whole new story just for them. I enjoy it all too much.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Not in Hailey’s chapters, because Frank’s and her life take completely different turns. They are busy with their own troubles. Plus there aren’t many Hailey chapters before the gen ending and I need to write about her kids more. I just am not sure how many bonuses I will have with so many ideas and plans I have for my beloved Frankie.

        Liked by 1 person

I'd love to read your thoughts! β™₯

Please log in using one of these methods to post your comment:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

w

Connecting to %s