Chapters

Chapter 4.10 I Am…Happy with not being a Proud Father

Warning: Swearing.

I couldn’t feel more awkward standing at the doorstep of the house my mother and grandfather lived in. The house I had never visited before. In my arms laid peacefully my daughter, an unwelcome warmth against my stomach that certainly didn’t help in making me feel more comfortable. I needed to fucking get rid of this child as soon as possible. In fact, I only agreed to mother’s proposition to visit in hopes of finally not having to look after the additional weight in my arms, the useless product of my own sperm, which I still somehow couldn’t believe was in fact mine. Would my mother maybe have something to say? I needed explanations of every kind as to what was happening.

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And there she was, at the doorstop, looking at me as if she had seen right through my silhouette. I swear her expression was so blank that I could have well not been there at all. The light made her stand in the shadows, which made the impression even stronger. I in the light, she– always in the darkness. I once again realized I was holding a child that I only knew had to have her head protected- wow, I’m such a great parent already.
My mother nodded at me and encouraged me to follow her– actually, encourage is not a good word, because she said it in a tone that completely matched the blank look she was giving me.

As we got inside, it wasn’t as dark as I thought it would be, which came with a dose of surprise. I also had a better chance to look at my crazy-ass mother in her dress looking like she took it out of the same junkyard she used to visit so often when I was a child and with leggings that looked more like she had literal scales on her legs. Oh fuck, this gotta be a weird encounter indeed.

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As soon as we entered, an old man I recognized as my mother’s  father, the boring guy from the second diary, patted the sofa on both his sides. Well, I could only hope that it wouldn’t take too long.

“Emmie, Sam, great-granddaughter, come on. We’ve got a few things to talk over, right?”

I hesitantly took the place next to the man, the feeling of being unfit stronger than ever. Why did it have to be that there were no people that I got on with worse than with my own family? I would say that the only thing we shared was the last name, but even that distanced us from another (not that it was any better with my other grandparents, Kelly and Francis Robinson, who both died 2 years before I had had that encounter).

So here we are, three heirs, three completely different points of view.

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After a moment of pregnant silence, my grandfather finally decided to start the conversation.

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“I am really, really pleased that you took the decision to visit us, Sam. I have missed seeing my grandson and I can’t wait to find out what you have been up to,” he smiled genuinely at the baby. Gross. Everything was gross in the way he talked, in his obvious good intentions and love for everyone. How could someone like this even exist and not get crushed by world? This was rather uncalled for, considering how horrible I was to both him and my mother throughout the years, but I thought I’d not question it since he at least was kind enough to greet me properly (looking at you, mother).

“Yes, I actually…First, I will need some explanations. Mother?” She looked as though I ripped her off from a trans she was in. She absently shook her head and looked at me, just finally looked at me for the first time during the visit. She looked rather sad and resigned.

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“Yes, Sam?”

“How did you meet Heather to do the blood tests? I never knew. You should have told me.” It was really my first thought as soon as I saw my mother’s face after 4 years.

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“It was she who came over and introduced herself as your ex-girlfriend. She was very nice and said that she wasn’t sure whether she had a baby with you or her ex-boyfriend, so I agreed to help her.” That. Fucking. Bitch. Why was she always so sly? But at least her slyness had its end to it- still couldn’t believe how lucky I got to have her die! Now only to get rid of the baby… But yeah, back to my darling mother, who didn’t think it was important enough for me to actually know about being a father.

“And why?  Why the f…why in the world wouldn’t you tell me such a thing?”

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“Does it matter anyway? You are here only to get rid of your daughter. Plus, did you care about your family– did you care about me at all? Never in my life have I dreamt of having such a disappointment as my only child!” And then, just like that, tears started streaming down her face. Grandfather gently stroked her hair and looked at me. I was still looking away and pretending I wasn’t the cause of all this pathetic crying. It really started getting on my nerves.

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“You shouldn’t have called him a disappointment, honey. No one is a disappointment. You also aren’t, just to remind you. That is definitely not the way to solve things. Sam maybe isn’t like the perfect child we both imagined him to grow up to become, but he is our boy and we should love him for who is,” he reasoned. She instantly stood up and began screaming like a crazy-ass woman she had been ever since I could remember.

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“But…look at him! He brings shame to our family with how he acts and looks. How am I to treat him kindly when he cares about no one but his own butt? I tried, I tried so hard to…to turn things back to how they should be. And this curse…this curse made it. Looks are deceiving and so is the fact that I didn’t sleep with anyone but Seth during our marriage. He is Anthony’s son. Pure blood. I swear he has nothing of Seth, but every bit of his broken personality comes from Anthony!” Oh fuck, how do I get out unnoticed? It’s not like I wanted to have anything to do with that particular case. I didn’t even care.

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“You are not making any sense, honey. As far as looks are considered, he couldn’t be more similar to Seth, bless his soul. Besides, Anthony has nothing to do with Sam. I told you that you should forget about this high school romantic interest,” he continued gently. And by that alone I could tell that grandfather didn’t hear the whole story. He had no idea about how Anthony really messed with my mother’s already fucked up head. But it wasn’t like I had any intention to tell him how things really stood.

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In that moment my daughter started crying, apparently wanting to unite her laments with the ones that belonged to my mother. And it worked like a magical spell, because my mother stopped shouting and looked at the baby. In a moment her finger was already pointing up at the sky.

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“I know! I know!” She started nodding frantically like she suddenly came up with an idea for another of her stupid inventions. “Maybe there is still hope yet. Maybe she is…maybe the curse isn’t…You are right, completely right, Sam. She will be my lifeline. Our lifeline. She will save our family!” All of a sudden, she took the child from my arms and hugged her.

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Grandfather was probably as confused as I was, but he was always more practical than my mother. At least that was not as annoying about his personality.

“What’s her name?” He asked me.

“I was told it’s Nathifa.” There was no way I could forget how Heather made fun of me from the grave. Nathifa was a Simgyptian name just like Samien was. What’s more, it literally meant pure. Heather, if you hear me, please acknowledge that as far as I’m concerned,  anything that came out of you will never be pure.

Meanwhile my mother started shaking her head as frantically as she was nodding just a while before.

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“No, that wouldn’t work. She needs to follow the family naming scheme,” she opposed.

“We could keep Nathifa as her second name,” suggested my grandfather, probably wanting to get it done with as fast as I did. Or maybe I was just making up things because I wanted to run as fast as I could to get away from my insane family.

“Hailey, she will be Hailey,” my mother stated after a moment of silence. “Hailey Nathifa Rosenthal. The only person able to make our family great again.”

“Hailey Nathifa Rosenthal,” I murmured to myself, “is not my problem anymore.” And for the first time since I had come to this house, a big smile spread across my face.

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Note: I have to tell you that Sam was looking the other way the whole time during the encounter and I even tried buying a TV to get him to actually look at Gemma, but he kept getting up from the sofa to watch.

And just to clear things out, since I actually decided to work on those ages matching things- during the encounter Dellie’s 67, Gemma’s 42 and Sam’s 22.

So, anyone still completely in love with Dellie’s lovable personality? 😀

49 thoughts on “Chapter 4.10 I Am…Happy with not being a Proud Father”

  1. Ah, Dellie! It’s always good to see him. ❤ ❤

    Gemma is losing her mind. hahaha I do like the name she chose, though. Hailey is going to have some challenges, growing up in this family, especially with Sam as her father. lol I am so geeked though because I can't wait to see what she looks like and to also get to know her.

    I wonder if Sam is just dumping Hailey off or if Gemma won't take her unless Sam is involved? I'm excited to find out!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I know, I am so irritated that Sam doesn’t want to see him, when I often do!
      Do Gemma’s actions remind you of a certain someone? I fear that she isn’t going to escape her genes and predispositions for certain mental illnesses, especially after she’s been through so much. She’s messed up in the head and hard, sadly.
      I know, Rosenthals are certainly not your average family. I can’t wait, too. I do know what she looks like (let’s just say that the family resemblance stays strong) , but I don’t know all of the traits, so I can’t wait to find out.
      Hm, you will see whether Sam is done with the kid for good!

      Liked by 2 people

      1. Yes, Gemma definitely reminds me of her. It’s one of the first things I thought when we saw her here.

        I think it’s cool when the family has strong genes and they come through in the heirs.

        Liked by 1 person

  2. Wow, Gemma saying that Sam’s personality is like Anthony’s was harsh considering he’s practically a criminal, but then again, so is Sam so I can totally see it… he really isn’t anything like Seth at all. Sam seems so eager to dump Hailey, I don’t see him changing himself to stick around and take care of her. I’m guessing she will be the next heir unless Sam ends up having another accidental child XD OR by some miracle finds love (still doubtful of that last part) Dellie is just the cutest! And though I was glad to see Gemma again, it doesn’t seem like she’ll ever completely be ok after losing both her husband and in some ways her son. But maybe this child will change some of that. Wondering where this shall go~ 🙂
    Also, are we 100% sure Heather is dead? For some reason I’m not entirely convinced… hmm

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I know, it was really harsh. From that moment 4 years back Gemma can’t stop thinking about Anthony, therefore she made that comparison. She’s very disappointed with how Sam turned out to be. All this time, she was waiting, hoping that he’d after all feel so human emotions, but he didn’t and it didn’t make her feel better at all. No, that would be very unlikely for Sam to change. Hm, yeah, she has very high chances to become gen.5 heir! Finds love, isn’t it like a good joke?
      I know, Dellie is so cute! For a moment there I thought that maybe he’d change and lose his sweet nature, but nah, he wouldn’t be able to, that sits very deeply in him.
      No, unfortunately, Gemma will never be okay. Trouble comes also from her mother, who suffered from a mental illness, Gemma is likely to have as well. Who knows, really. All we know for sure is that she is really messed in the head, more than she’s ever been.
      Suspicions, suspicions…What makes you think that?

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Well Heather was so secretive and so far we only know she’s dead because Cedric said so… idk maybe she was involved in some shady business and needed to disappear? Until we found out what exactly happened I shall remain on the fence :p

        Liked by 1 person

  3. Dellie!! ❤ ❤ I really missed him..! It's good that he's around too, because little Hailey didn't stand a chance with only Gemma as a caregiver!
    It's funny, I was watching "Mindhunter" the other day, and there was a serial killer/psychopath saying that his mother kept belittling and demeaning him all his life, and now I see Gemma doing exactly that to Sam. It's no surprise really that he turned out to be like this (the spore was there on its own, sure, but no better way than a mother like this to actually make the spore grow). Gemma is a messed up woman for sure!
    On a different note, I can't wait to find out more about little Hailey and see how she will turn out! ❤

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Yay! I really missed him, too. I do love him.
      He is like one of the few people in the family that didn’t completely lose their minds. I’d say he’s pretty much in his role, in contrary to Sam- he’s been supporting broken women (and Eddie) most of his life, so I guess he’s got a bunch of experience with comforting people! And that’s also why he wouldn’t let anyone demean the other as he sees how disastrous effects it can have.
      Oh yes, Gwmma may not have done this to him on purpose, but she wasn’t a good mother to him and maybe it was better that she didn’t have more children. She has always been living in her own world. In many ways, she certainly takes a lot after Grace, even if she wouldn’t want to admit it. The trauma only helped in messing up her mind even more.
      Yay, can’t wait, too! ❤️

      Liked by 1 person

  4. I have finally lived to see the family gathering. I missed them so much, especially Dellie. It’s a very good news he’s still alive. Dellie was a good man as always. He has in himself a lot of empathy. He will never change and this is the reason why I love him so much ♥ Poor Gemma, she must feel awfully. Her only son turned out to be a “disappointmend”. She was left alone in the world with many problems. Only our beloved Dellie be with her. Sam didn’t care about her. It’s sad her motherhood failed. The exact opposite of Gemma is Sam. (I’m talking about a parenthood). What kind of egiost he is? This is typical for him, no surprises. I’m glad he gave the baby in good hands. Sam wouldn’t be a good father. I’d feel sorry for baby if he was her parent. I thought Gemma get angry when she found out that she will be simultaneously a mother and a grandmother. It’s good she see the chance to upbringing her granddaughter. Sam is free now. Enjoy it while you can. Sam’s expressions were asuming. He is pure evil with blue eyes. And the last thing, I finally know the baby’s name 😀 For me this name associate with someone. That’s all. I want to know what will happen in the next chapter, now!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I, too, missed Dellie a lot. He’s very sweet! If only we could all act with so much compassion as him.
      Gemma has been through a lot. Sam only added up to the iceberg of problems Gemma already had to deal with. I am not sure whether Sam is Gemma’s exact opposite as far as parenthood is concerned, because she didn’t care about him in the crucial time of his development when he was little, as she buried herself into the inventing.
      No, Gemma wasn’t angry. She is still deep down sorry that she had a miscarriage with Anthony’s child, so that solves it.
      You finally know who HN is.
      I also liked blue-eyed Sam.

      Liked by 1 person

  5. Any time I get to see Dellie, my favorite Rosenthal, it is a good chapter. ❤ ❤ He is Mr. Positive Attitude as always. Trying to keep his family together as usual.
    Hopefully Gemma will be a better grandmother to Hailey than she was a mother to Sam.
    I was pretty much raised by my grandparents, and I turned out okay.
    And I don't blame him for not wanting to look at Gemma during this whole interaction. He wanted to be rid of the baby so he can get back to his own life.
    Hailey, you are the savior of the Rosenthal family name. You are the one to break the curse. No pressure!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Dellie is my favorite, too. I can’t believe he kept his wonderful personality after all that he’s been through. But I couldn’t have it any other way. Fidelio Rosenthal- keeping his family together since the world began its existence, lol.
      Yes, Gemma needs to finally become a good guardian to a child, but it is very unlikely. After all part of Sam’s egoism must come from her, because she was never the saint in the field of seflessness as well.
      Oh, just don’t let Grace do anything with Hailey!
      Oh yeah, he didn’t want to look at anyone, just in the direction of the front door and I thought “wow, Sam, you really must feel awkward and unfit”. Meanwhile Gemma was continuously getting up, so I finally let her stand.
      Yup, no pressure! Psst- there is no breaking the curse, sorry, Gemma! No escaping your fate.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. I wouldn’t expect anything else from Dellie.
        I figured that there was no breaking the curse (where is the fun in that after all). But that is a lot of pressure to put on someone who can’t even hold her head up yet. All I can say is, “good luck little Hailey!”

        Liked by 1 person

  6. Sam’s a mess. Had I come to visit family, only to see how out of it my mother was, I would’ve ran for it, with my baby in tow. Not Sam, though. I guess he hasn’t had enough wake up calls in life.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Haha, I know. But Sam just wanted to get rid of a baby, I guess he would have no problems with killing it if he didn’t find a better alternative.
      Btw, you may’ve missed 100th special, but that didn’t bring anything into the story anyway.

      Liked by 1 person

  7. Wow, wow, wow –
    I really don’t envy Hailey Nathifa, cute little girl.
    Insane her father, insane her grandmother –
    I’m not sure about her mother too.
    Only left her grand-grandfather to raise and teach her for life.
    Is Gemma going so deep into her self-deception that she’s making herself believe Anthony has to be Sam’s father ?
    Someone else must be responsible, even a curse – that her son is such a dissapointment to her, that he didn’t care about her ?
    Every accusation is but pointing at herself too, despite her bad encounter with Tony.
    I think, if Sam’s walls around him, his ability to be almost numb about feelings,
    would be torn down one day, he would also lose his mind.
    If this will not happen anyway.

    Dellie is so wise and loveable, I really hope for Hailey he will become very, very old.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. I know – she will have it hard with such a family. And let’s not forget her great-grandmother, our lovely Gracie.
      Gemma is really messed up in the head, she’s always been, but ever since the rape it has gotten much worse.
      Yes, she’s deceiving herself and doesn’t want to admit that she’s largely at fault for Sam being who he is. Some things you take from home.
      That is a very good point about Sam’s inner walls breaking! I agree with you.
      That would be good if Dellie stayed around for as long as possible 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  8. Dellie is so pure. What a cinnamon roll. Such a contrast to Sam, too.
    I see that Gemma has had a hard time since Sam has been away… I feel sorry for Dellie always having to take care of everyone. I hope he helps to raise Hailey (beautiful name, btw) in a loving household and hopefully negates any…erm… delusions? that Gemma tries to pass on (though, the family is pretty cursed, so maybe it’s not delusional at all haha).

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I know, I am surprised at how different they are. Literal opposites, those two!
      Yes, she’s had. Don’t feel sorry, he’s pretty much in the right role and I guess it really helps him, when he can help people. It’s always been something that’s been keeping him from going insane like the rest of the family. He feels like he needs to be strong for the others. I hope he does, too! Oh, thank you, I needed a good H name this time 🙂 Maybe she’s the only person that’s right here after all, haha.

      Liked by 1 person

    1. Haha, because the family scheme – name has to start with H, because Heather’s name start with H and all the heirs’ spouses’s (or whatever Heather was to Sam) children have their names like that- Ethan-Edward, Frederick-Fidelio, Grace-Gemma, Seth-Samien. Family tradition is really important here! Haha, yeah, have always been a mess.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Thank you! I thought it’d be easier to take track of them if there were more rules. No, that’s not really the tradition, since I couldn’t make Samien a “Sammie”. That’d make him so mad!

        Like

  9. Sam is really making me mad this chapter with his thoughts about his mother. Also this about Heather: “…still couldn’t believe how lucky I got to have her die!” Wow, Sam, that’s really low. His evil character is really showing this chapter, and I love that when he was sitting on the couch facing away from Gemma that he started making the evil face.

    Love, love, love seeing Dellie and Gemma again. Unfortunately with Sam we don’t see any of the family often at all. 😦

    Love the name Hailey Nathifa. I hope Gemma will be all right taking care of her.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I know, he is really awful. He was making the evil face practically through the whole chapter, I was waiting for him to stop so I could take a decent photo, but he never did.
      I loved seeing them again, too. Such a contrary to Dellie’s generation filled with various family meetings!
      I hope so, too. And I’m glad you like the name.

      Liked by 1 person

  10. I love Hailey’s name! But I fear for her because Gemma looks like she wouldn’t be much better of a parent than Sam. I guess that’s to be expected of someone who raised the evil psycho that Sam is 😦 I am glad that Dellie is there to hopefully make sure baby Hailey doesn’t grow up to be a trainwreck like a lot of her family. It’s nice to hear his positive and kind words among Sam’s dark thoughts!

    Liked by 1 person

      1. Ha, ha, I’m sorry, I should have worn you. I wanted a theme in which the pictures are bigger. The sidebar bothered me a lot. And when I realized I could change for a fun background, I just couldn’t go with white.

        Liked by 1 person

  11. Thank goodness that Sam is not raising Hailey. Dellie is such a good parent – I hope he becomes her main caregiver, honestly. What is the family naming scheme? It doesn’t seem to be alphabetical… and it was great to see all these heirs together, even if it wasn’t under the best of conditions. I still can’t believe the kind of things Sam thinks – he’s happy that Heather died! You should never be happy about anyone’s death…unless they really hurt you. I guess in his mind, Heather did really hurt him… but I think you should only be happy about someone’s death if they kill a family member or if they’re like Anthony.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Yes… One of my readers mentioned that Gemma and Sam both are horrible parents. But Gemma never hated Sam, she was just absent, but she did love him.
      Hopefully, he does. You can see that Gemma became even more unstable ever since the incident with Anthony.
      The family naming scheme is just that the child’s name has to start with the same letter that the name of the parent who’s not heir, so it goes like this: Frederick-Fidelio, Grace-Gemma, George, Gilbert, Seth-Samien and now Heather-Hailey. It was never explicitly stated in the story, though, but I’ve been following these rules all the time.
      Yes, the three heirs next to one another… Such a rare occasion.
      Sam does think of horrible stuff, but it’s even worse, the things he can do. You’ll see… And yes, you’re right in that he believes Heather really did hurt him.

      Liked by 1 person

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